i just spent $200.64 on 21 cds from half.com and amazon. on the last night of cg retreat, i finally made the difficult decision to stop downloading music/movies. i know it's impossible to buy EVERY single cd for EVERY single song i've ever downloaded, but i'm trying to make up for it (slowly but surely). after singing I Surrender All ("Worldy pleasures all forsaken..."), it was over. i knew i was clearly sinning. no more of this illegal crap! it's always been a burden in my heart since that one discussion we had in paraguay, but my guilty conscience turned into a monster these past few months. even with things like Norton Antivirus and Windows XP, i would like to eventually go completely legit. call me conservative. call me anal. call me a pharisee. for me, it's just an integrity issue. for all you lawbreakers out there, i challenge you to join me in this movement!

in other news, i will not be going up north with jayne and sonia because sonia has "been coughing so much i think im gonna be gettin some 6 packs by the end of break." perhaps, God wanted me to avoid spending even more money on this much anticipated road trip due to the -$200.67. if is the Lord's will, then i will learn to be content.

Thought of the Day: Gay.
Song of the Day: 98 Degrees-Because Of You

this yg retreat was the most bittersweet retreat i've ever been to in my life.

bitter:

1. senior boys upset me alot.
2. i've never seen my students pay so little attention to me.
3. too cold to enjoy weather. not cold enough to snow.
4. the rooms and dining hall were cramped.
5. for the price of the retreat, the food should've been much better.
6. skits were poor in quality. edification was lacking.
7. sean and terrance both got their laptops stolen. really sorry guys.
8. many students were sick and got others sick.

sweet:

1. pastor peter sim was sola scriptura and christ-centered up the butt. "heaven does not begin when you die; it begins when you believe...on the cross, Christ was thirsty so that we would never have to be thristy again...your life is not worthless because God gave up His son for you and your life now brings glory to God...we do not become saints; we ARE saints...we will persevere beacuse Jesus persevered...in heaven, we will sit down at the throne of God: we are kings!"
2. many many students learned and appreciated TULIP.
3. my team won best cheer and skit. well, with this year's groups, i guess that doesn't really say much. mighty mighty Calvinists!
4. terrance made john the stone ro cry...along with the rest of the yg.
5.
Upload Video at DropShots.com

so i've received a few gifts for Christmas already. you know a gift is bad when you're scrambling to look for the gift receipt. my brother never gives me gifts because he never has money. this year, he gave me a $10 giftcard to BestBuy. i don't like receiving giftcards as gifts...but receiving it from Sheemones makes it the best x-mas gift ever.

Thought of the Day: Best of the best.
Song of the Day: Foo Fighters-End Over End

i had an 89.6% in my psych. research methods class and he gave me a B+. it truly was the worst class i ever took at UCI.

i paid $12.50 to watch Memoirs of a Geisha at the Grove at 11:40pm. i liked it.

crush.

Thought of the Day: Ditzy.
Song of the Day: 98 Degrees-Because Of You

If thou hast drawn a thousand times
Oh Lord draw me again.

Thought of the Day: Disciplines.
Song of the Day: If Thou Hast Drawn

Lucky Sevens

seven things i plan to do before i die:
1. Find myself a God-fearing woman.
2. Become a GOOD 8th/9th grade math teacher.
3. Eat Italian food in Italy.
4. Go to a Foo concert in the pit this time.
5. Perfect my Korean.
6. Eat sushi/ramen in Japan.
7. Directly evangelize to someone and see them come to Christ.

seven things i can do:
1. Make pretzels.
2. Eat a lot of salad.
3. Pop my jaw.
4. Beat anyone in Super Puzzle Fighter and Streetfighter vs. X-Men (playstation only).
5. Drive up north without stopping once.
6. Watch Pulp Fiction and Swingers over and over and over again.
7. Make you laugh with my dance moves.

seven things i cannot do:
1. Sleep with any noise/light.
2. Play guitar.
3. Arminianism.
4. Pop gum.
5. Roll my tongue.
6. Beat John Ro in pingpong.
7. Write legibly.

seven things that attract me to the opposite sex:
1. humorous-we both have to be able to make each other laugh.
2. teachable-i have to be able to lead you.
3. generous-self-explanatory.
4. cute-we're talking physical and personality. can't learn it. it's all genes here.
5. diligent-girls aren't supposed to be lazy. only guys are.
6. healthy-proper nutrition, exercise, and hygiene is good for physical attraction.
7. mature-proper relationships and humility is good for emotional attraction.

send in your resumes, ladies. =D

seven things that i say most often:
1. what up?
2. oh no!
3. what a lil baby!
4. can you just...
5. goodbye.
6. Sheemones!
7. oh yeah?

seven celebrity crushes (only in these appearances):
1. Jennifer Love Hewitt (Can't Hardly Wait)
2. Jennifer Anniston (Friends)
3. Renee Zellweger (Jerry Maguire)
4. Nicole Kidman (Batman Forever/Moulin Rouge)
5. Keira Knightley (Love Actually)
6. Audrey Hepburn (Roman Holiday)
7. Emmy Rossum (The Day After Tomorrow/Phantom of the Opera)

Quotes

"These songs (Mercy Me) are for middle-aged people and not for younger people right? I mean, it's not like one of those crazy songs like "ONE WAY! JE~SUS!""
-Mom

"I did not see him with my bodily eyes, but with the eyes of mine understanding; and thus it was. One day I was very sad, I think sadder than at any one time in my life; and this sadness was through a fresh sight of the greatness and vileness of my sins: and as i was then looking for nothing but Hell, and the everlasting damnation of my soul, suddenly, as I thought, I saw the Lord Jesus look down from Heaven upon me, and saying, 'Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved.'
But I replied, 'Lord, I am a great, a very great sinner'; and he answered, 'My grace is sufficient for thee.' Then I said 'But Lord, what is believing?' And then I saw from that saying He that cometh to me shall never hunger, and he that believe on me shall never thrist that believing and coming was all one, and that he that came, that is, run out in his heart and affections after salvation by Christ, he indeed believed in Christ. Then the water stood in mine eyes, and I asked further, 'But Lord, may such a great sinner as I am be indeed accepted of thee, and be saved by thee?' And I heard him say, 'And him that cometh to me, I will in no wise cast out.' Then I said, 'But how, Lord, must I consider of thee in my coming to thee, that my faith may be placed aright upon thee?' Then he said, 'Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. He is the end of the law for righteousness to every one that believes. He died for our sins, and rose again for our justification. He loved us, and washed us from our sins in his own blood. He is mediator between God and us. He ever liveth to make interecession for us.' From all which I gathered that I must look for righteousness in his person, and for satisfaction for my sins by his blood; that what he did in obedience to the Father's law, and in submitting to the penalty thereof, was not for himself, but for him that will accept it for his salvation, and be thankful. And now was my heart full of joy, mine eyes full of tears, and mine affections running over with love, to the name, people and ways of Jesus Christ...
It made me see that all the world, notwithstanding all the righteousness thereof, is in a state of condemnation. It made me see that God the Father, though he be just, can justly justify the coming sinner. It made me greatly ashamed of the vileness of my former life, and confounded me with the sense of mine own ignorannce; for there never came through into mine heart before now that showed me so the beauty of Jesus Christ. It made me love a holy life, and long to do something for the honour and glory of the name of the Lord Jesus. Yea, I thought, that had I now a thousand gallons of blood in my body, I could spill it all for the sake of the Lord Jesus."
-Hopeful from The Pilgrim's Progress

Thought of the Day: Bad girl.
Song of the Day: Let Us Love And Sing And Wonder

i've been on winter break since wednesday 10:00am. i blanked out on both of my finals so i was unable to produce the best results of my long hours of studying. it's ok though; it's not about the grade anyways. but to celebrate from finishing the hardest qtr i've ever had in my life, i went straight to riverside to play with sonia blade, yommy, and turrence (from puraguay). after a long day (and an even longer night) with those companions, i drove back towards cerritos. as i was driving on the 91, i saw this big billboard that said, "Remember the reason for the season. Luke 2:11." i thought that was a nice reminder for the thousands of drivers who pass by the area. when i got home, i also read chang's xanga about how the joy of celebrating Christ should not be limited to just December 25th or Easter Sunday. another very encouraging reminder. but today as i was brushing my teeth, i thought about that Christ being the reason statement. i think for chrisitans, that statement should be shortened to just: Remember the reason! we do not merely remember the reason for the season alone. we ought to remember the reason for EVERYTHING. the reason for studying. the reason for hanging out in riverside. the reason for watching stupid things like Family Guy or bowling on Wednesday nights. the reason why we work at our part-time jobs. the reason why we have what we have and do what we do. we breathe, feel, and move because of one thing: Christ.

Acts 17:24-25-The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else.

1 Corinthians 10:31-So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

Yes!!!

my cd-rom won't open. can somebody help me?

i'm getting fat.

Thought of the Day: "KEVIN!"
Song of the Day: Mariah Carey-All I Want For Christmas Is You

Philip:

I have it :)
Thank you for such a wonderful quarter.
Dr. C

i just sighed out 50 pounds of relief. Thank you, Lord!

a few things that have made my day so far...

1. as i was walking through the parking lot, i saw this sweater-hooded girl inside her car with the front seat pushed up all the way to the steering wheel. the front seat was tilted forward at a good 50 degree angle and her head lay motionless on top of the steering wheel. i like it when i see other students sharing in my sufferings.

2. as soon as i finished my psych. final, i went straight to the nearest garbage can and thew away EVERY SINGLE handout, lab, lecture note, and article. then i sold both of my psych books. purge.

3. on Beach and Artesia, i saw a guy with sunglasses, dressed up in a Santa Clause suit, with a sign that said "Tool Sale." it's a pretty warm day for December. life is tough.

4. Foo Fighters. catharsis.

5. all four blogs/xangas i just read were really good.

(6). the last thing that will make/complete my day is when i receive Dr. C's email indicating that she safely received my folder containing my 20 page paper & co. i cannot accurately describe the anxiety i'm experiencing right now because of this. yeah, that would hella make my day.

btw, i am still under the bondage of Mr. Delirious Man.

phil is under the bondange of Mr. Delirious Man.

his only means of escape is sleep.

he reads words like "caffeine," as "cocaine."

Mr. Delirious Man wishes Sunshine Kim a happy 22.

somebody save phil!

Thought of the Day: Down.
Song of the Day: Andy Williams-It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

"Those who know God's mercy must operate on the principle of mercy. If they do not show mercy but insist on justice, they willl receive justice rather than mercy. We must not minimize the seriousness of this matter. An unforgiving heart is a heart that is subject to torment "until (its debtor) should pay back all" that is owed, which in the case of any human being equates to forever. A truly forgiving heart is the fruit of regeneration."
-Reformation of the Study Bible

lol. ponzu sauce.

lol. snugs.

Thought of the Day: Just a sinner who didn't get enough sleep.
Song of the Day: Queen-Crazy Little Thing Called Love

"But when I am born again of the Spirit of God, I know that Jesus Christ did not come to teach only: He came to make me what He teaches I should be."
-Oswald Chambers

Thought of the Day: Sin produces sin.
Song of the Day: The Beatles-Come Together

i started my christmas shopping list today. i first write down names, then a price that i'm willing to spend, and finally, another list of each individual's interests/hobbies. it's really sad when i can only think of two or three interests for a person. for example, for some of the people i just wrote:

-clothes
-alcohol

or

-anime
-electronics

but have no fear if you qualify in either of these areas. i can usually think of something creative every birthday or Christmas. i take great pride in the gifts that i get for (most) people...except for the time i got those Dinoriders dvds for dinko. sorry about that.

Thought of the Day: Medium!
Song of the Day: Mercy Me-Homesick

last night...

i went to my very first UCI basketball game. that crap was SO fun! i learned a lot of new things last night.

1. what the Bren Events looks like.
2. that UCI has cheerleaders and a dance team!
3. that we actually beat Stanford a few days ago.
4. UCI students get to watch games for free.

i even got a yellow C.I.A (Completely Insane Anteater) t-shirt for free! i always wondered why so many people had those shirts, but i learned that they give you a new one every year for free when you attend a sporting event. it was really fun cheering with the other irvine students. Peter the Anteater, our mascot, even gave me a high-five! my favorite cheer of the night was: "IT'S ALL OVER!" *CLAPCLAP CLAPCLAP CLAP* our record is 3-1 after last night's win. i've never seen so many zot hands go up at once. never been so proud to be an Anteater in my life.

today...

at exactly 3:45pm, my car broke 200,000 miles! it was cool cause all of the digits were turning as i was pulling into my driveway. for the longest time, i always told people that i was going to throw a party when my car hit 200,000. ain't no party when you're all alone in the car. just me and her. i couldn't have asked for a more perfect situation. haha. i actually started having imaginations of my car exploding as soon as the last mile changed. if there's one worldly thing i'm thankful for this Thanksgiving, it's God's providence over my car. she may be no Mustang, but she secretly makes me really happy.

tomorrow...

i will be celebrating my second real Thanksgiving dinner at Snugs' place with a few other fellas. i am definitely looking forward to the 15 pound turkey, hours of hold'em, some Swingers, and some delectable pumpkin pie! i love that word: delectable.

Thought of the Day: Alternating Harmonic Series.
Song of the Day: Biggie-Big Poppa

there was no Lovefest last week. there is no Lovefest tonight. there will be no Lovefest next week. woe is me!

Thought of the Day: Golf is not a sport.
Song of the Day: The Ventures-Pipeline

there's this chinese girl in my math discussion who sits near me. she's pretty quiet and looks really innocent and pure kinda like nina ("neeners") or sonya. well, today after class, instead of asking the TA, she asked me if knew how many quizzes were going to be dropped out of the total. of all the times she could have chosen to talk to me, she chose a time when my runny nose was dripping with snot as i was busy wiping away with my hand. "uh...how many quizzes? i think one." *SNIFF!* she'll probably never talk to me again.

i was studying at commons last week and out of no where, this girl ran by and hit me pretty hard. "hi!" but after taking a closer look at my face, she realized that i wasn't one of her friends. "oh my, i am so sorry!" and then she scurried off all embarrassed. she had glasses. she was pretty. she'll probably never talk to me again.

i'm really sick right now and i have terrible neck pains. i desperately need your prayers for my physical condition right now. the neck pains especially are a thorn in my flesh. i don't know if it's because i'm stressed or because i studied in a bad posture for several hours or because i slept retarded. i can't even move my head back all the way cause it feels like something's going to pop in my neck. more than the girls that'll probably never talk to me again, i need for you to pray for my physical sufferings. the Lord listens to the prayers of His people. let it be true!

Thought of the Day: -3.
Song of the Day: Foo Fighters-Wind Up

why is my mom so scared to drive on the freeway?!

Thought of the Day: Covariation.
Song of the Day: Dave Matthews Band-Crash Into Me Fatboy Slim Mix

i've been taking linear algebra this quarter and i will unashamedly proclaim that it is really difficult for me. i feel so humbled when i overhear students in the class tell each other how easy this class is. what can i say? i'm just NOT GOOD AT MATH! after every clusters meeting, i have to ask d. lai for help with the homework. right before every discussion, i have to ask the white guy that always sits behind me for help with the homework. it's become so common and routine that when i asked him how to do a problem today, he sarcastically responded, "MAGIC!" that hurt my feelings...but he still helped me.

yesterday, i was so discouraged by the homework problems and lecture that i actually stayed after class to talk to the professor. this is the same professor that judy and i always make fun of because of his thick chinese accent and chipmunk physique. but after some thorough explanations on the board, i honestly understood everything he said and i was really really grateful. he wasn't even mean about it or anything. very patient with my ignorance. very pleased when i got the correct answer. "yeSS!" with a single nod. haha. he even went out of his way to ask me if the lectures were helpful and what i thought of the textbook. after i told him my concerns, he told me he was going to talk to the TA about making easier quizzes and post the solutions to the homework problems online. and believe it or not, he sent an email out to the whole class on the same day announcing that he would post up solutions to the homework problems. the only thing he lied about was the quiz. they're still hard. 1 for 2. not bad.

Thought of the Day: Angry.
Song of the Day: Foo Fighters-Lonely As You

"You must guard your imagination if you want to guard your heart. Don�t feed a lonely heart with cheesy romance novels or chick flicks and fantasize about the men or the relationships described. This can quickly become lust�lusting to be lusted after. Don�t allow yourself to imagine someone is interested in you when he is just being friendly. Don�t imagine that he had a tender look when he said hello to you, when he was really just giving you a polite greeting. In other words, do not develop wild crushes. If the man in question shows an interest elsewhere, you will be hurt, and depending on how much you indulged your imagination, you may be devastated. Be realistic about the men who show you attention. If you are too eager for a relationship, you can imagine he is godlier, funnier, sweeter, smarter, older, or taller than he really is. If you have to talk yourself into someone, you are not being realistic about this man. Don�t get desperate! Don�t allow yourself to get involved in an inappropriate relationship because you are lonely. Don�t look for a man as a ticket out. You may want to move out or move on, but that is not a good reason to get married. "
-Nancy Wilson (Douglas Wilson's wife)

scream AMEN with me! thanks, john and thank you, Mrs. Wilson!

Thought of the Day: #/0=Infinity.
Song of the Day: GOD-Meeting

i had Red Lobster for the first time tonight. garlic shrimp is delicious. i like eric and sunny. party animals.

Thought of the Day: Bahama Mama!
Song of the Day: Black Eyed Peas-My Humps

right now, i'm printing out my 22nd article for my research paper. i have two more to print out after this. i printed so many pages that i had to put in a new ink cartridge and even that one just ran out now! my brother hates my noisy printer with all his heart. i, on the other hand, hate my upper div writing class with all my heart. no, i take that back...i don't hate it. it's just A LOT of work. my research paper is always always on my mind. in fact, this morning i woke up thinking about self-esteem and identity issues that influence academic retention. !!!

after feeling discouraged from my math class, i debated whether or not i should stay for psych. but since i needed to talk to rebecca about the lab hw, i decided to bear through it. after deciding to work on the lab together after class, we went to commons and sat down at the computers. as i was looking through my backpack, i couldn't find my floppy disk anywhere! my floppy disk with my two drafts for my research paper. my floppy disk with the two crucial articles that i spent 4 hours looking for last night. losing this disk would have produced some loud cuss words for sure. but by the grace of God, it was still inside the computer that i had worked on last night. *SIIIIIIIGH* if i had not gone to class, i would've lost everything. if i had fudged the lab last week to finish early, i would've lost everything. if i had not asked rebecca to work on the lab together, i would've lost everything. was i merely lucky? heck no! that was God's providence FOR SURE!

it's only 2:30 and it's already been a long day. my articles are done printing.

Thought of the Day: Juggling too many eggs.
Song of the Day: Weezer-Beverly Hills

i can be ridiculously annoying sometines...well, maybe a lil more often than sometimes. a lot of times, i catch myself being really obnoxious and/or selfish. it's usually in the form of words. i have the worst habit of complaining and speaking my mind to whomever i think deserves to hear it. even when i'm joking or trying to be funny, it's almost always something discouraging or arrogant. it's no wonder why so many people cannot tell if i'm being sarcastic or not. i am a negative ambiguity.

it's funny cause there was actually a point where i believed i was socially flawless. i wished people could be a better example of me on so many different levels. thank goodness that was a long time ago...or was it? i guess seeing many of my flaws now doesn't necessarily mean that i have stopped believing a fallacy. i still have a ridiculous standard and when you don't match up, you better watch out cause i'm judging you with a passion. i love to impose. i need things my way. that's probably why most people think i'm an only child. just give me 5 min. and i'll show you a brat who thinks he's so mature. i am so immature. i am so stupid. i am so embarrassed.

the more you get to know me, the more you'll realize how inconsistent i can be. i'm really not that nice. i am shamefully ignorant. my humor sucks. i am intimidating and give bad first impressions. i can't tolerate that much. and no matter how much i work out, i am just a flabby long guy. phil sucks!

in today's staff meeting, john ro told us the sermon he heard from the 8:00 morning service. basically, the pastor was saying how he has a friend who has two kids who do really well in school. they always bring home A's and faithfully please their father. the pastor, on the other hand, has two kids who do not do so well in school. in other words, the pastor's children are not as desirable as his friend's children. but if you were to ask the pastor if he would ever trade his kids for his friend's, he would never! the reason is because he does not love his children based on their actions or accomplishments. rather, he loves them because of their status: they are his! in a similar way, God loves us not based on what we do. rather, He loves us because He sees us as His children. He would never trade us away.

i am utterly flawed in every way, but the Lord does not look upon me with anger or disgust or regret. i am His because Christ traded his righteousness for my flaws. he took all of my stupid and ugly and evil. judge me all you want. God looks upon me with favor. that is all that matters. Hallelujah!

Thought of the Day: "Ggam-jja-gee-yah!"
Song of the Day: Bijou-Thank You

random #1:

during my math midterm, the professor was writing how much time was left on the board. as he wrote a big "2," this really nerdy guy behind me yelled, "there's only 2 min. left?!" then the professor proceeds to write a "1" in front of the "2" to indicate that there was 12 min. left. the nerdy guy starts laughing this awfully awkward laugh that only nerds can laugh all outstandingly by himself. it really wasn't that funny, but the nerd thought it was hilarious. i felt really embarrassed for him. what a funny guy.

random #2:

it's really hard to figure out a math problem when you have System of a Down stuck in your head.

random #3:

Fundamentalist 93% Reformed Evangelical 82% Neo orthodox 75% Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan 71% Emergent/Postmodern 43% Roman Catholic 36% Modern Liberal 29% Classical Liberal 18% Charismatic/Pentecostal 18% What's your theological worldview? created with QuizFarm.com

Thought of the Day: Paper.
Song of the Day: Weezer-Island In The Sun

there's absolutely nothing like hearing david grohl's scream in real life.





btw, foo fighters make weezer look like crap.

Thought of the Day: "Whoo-hoo!"
Song of the Day: Foo Fighters-Everlong

1 annotated bibliography and outline + 1 psych midterm + 1 Lovefest in 3 days = 10.5 hours of sleep.

Thought of the Day: Uncreation.
Song of the Day: DC Talk-In The Light

i never knew this movie was so Gospel-centered. i almost cried when Miriam and Tirzah were healed of their leprosy. what a beautiful picture of forgiveness. double imputation is crazy. our Lord truly loves us.

Thought of the Day: "I felt him take the sword out of my hand."
Song of the Day: Foo Fighters-Everlong

"Just as Jesus was not defiled by contact with lepers, so he is not corrupted by contact with "sinners."  He is the physician who heals spiritual as well as physical sickness.  But those who do not know they are sick do not go to a doctor.  Lack of awareness of serious disease is often the most insidious "symptom" of all."

Thought of the Day:  96 Degrees.

Song of the Day:  Boa-Shine We Are

do you guys remember that old korean song, "Nul Buryussuh", by E&C (Eddie & Chris?)? well, i don't. i only heard about them from a few people back in high school and i always heard their first (and only) album was pretty good. well luckily, i randomly found that Nul Buryussuh song in a forum today. i really like it. it has that old school flavor.

there's a big part of me that wishes i could go back in time to that era-'96-'98. in fact, i was downloading Diva and SES music videos yesterday. ah, those middle school years. the happy korean music days. baggy pants. brown bangs. pager code. breakdancing. tommy hilfiger jackets. "west side." lol.

Thought of the Day: Effective is better than Efficacy.
Song of the Day: Chun Sang Ji Hee-Boomerang

Thought of the Day: Black teeth.
Song of the Day: Diva-Why Do You Call Me?

leprosy. A variety of skin diseases may bave been termed "leprosy", but the dominant form was Hansen's disease, a disfiguring bacterial infection that attacks the skin and nerves, often resulting in loss of feeling and muscle control. Loss of feeling can lead to infection and decay from unnoticed injury, while loss of muscle control can lead to atrophy and even paralysis. In advanced stages the rotting flesh can literally crumble off the extremities and even the face. This "living death" was greatly feared and served as a graphic picture of sin. Touching a leper made one ceremonially unclean. In this case, however, Jesus did not become unclean, but the leper became clean. Although the sin that resides within each of us is immeasurealy more disgusting to Jesus than leprosy, he is willing to touch us also and make us clean.
-Spirit of the Reformation Study Bible commentary

Thought of the Day: RER.
Song of the Day: Third Day-Medley

i am finally back in education. so far, i don't like any of my classes this quarter. my math professor is a foreign immigrant, my psych TA sounds even worse than him, and i have a very hard time appreciating research methods for my psychology lab. the commute to irvine every monday, wednesday, and friday morning takes one hour. *groan* maybe i'm just not conditioned yet. but i know today was one crappy second day of school-

missed street turns twice.
late for class.
finished lab early but forgot to save data. started over.
the ear part of my sunglasses snapped off.
took the 55 instead of the 5. traffic. a car almost hit me.

"sounds like somebody's got a case of the mondays!" right? i'm sure tuesday will be much better. i can wake up at 9:45 as opposed to today's 6:20...plus, we're starting clusters tomorrow! i never thought i'd ever be excited about leading clusters. it's a good thing. tomorrow HAS to be better than today.

there's been a lot of fuss about people leaving churches these days. many members left after p. dennis went to go start off City Light. even after that craze, i still heard of a few who left for other reasons. i know the youth group has had a pattern of students leaving the church once they hit that infamous senior year in high school. and if you hadn't heard, recently, kcpc had a woman pastor come into their youth group. that obviously did some damage to their congregation as well. what's going on here? church members bouncing in and out. friends following friends to "better churches." various plans to leave the church after college group. seriously, what's going on here?

i have to admit that i've been tempted to leave CPC for selfish reasons before. but when it all comes down to it, dinko says, "switching churches is a cop out." there are only a few reasons why anyone should leave the visible church. i think this article from the OPC website does a decent job of putting it all together (thanks, chang): http://www.opc.org/new_horizons/NH00/0002d.html

Thought of the Day: Krazy Glue.
Song of the Day: Foo Fighters-My Hero

they don't spam.

Happy 21, Crawford.

Thought of the Day: Get your mind out of the gutter.
Song of the Day: Solid-Catch The Night's End

i'm really bored these days. reading books and watching movies can only entertain you for so long. i actually got really excited when my brother asked me to pick him up from school because the bus driver was late. i can't even fall asleep early only to leave me waking up at 11 every morning. this may disgust you but i'm actually longing for school. productivity. mind stimulation. hot girls. no, just kidding about the hot girls (i know everyone believes there is some truth behind every joke, but REALLY, just kidding). due to my lack of activities, i've been spending much of my time thinking about upcoming events, random people, and of course, myself.

i'm really looking forward to leading clusters this year. it's like having a fresh batch of people since so many couldn't commit last year. new group, new leader, and a new book pretty much makes it a new year.

i feel like a ton of people have hooked up in the past 6 months when it's only been 4 couples. well, i guess 4 is a pretty big number when you're referring to relationships. of course when people start hooking up with each other, you can't help but wonder about yourself. "i wonder when I'M going to meet her?" a number of stupid people still remind me that i only have until winter time til i have to commit to lifetime missions. (shaking head). but nevertheless, it is something that i think about alot. since i'm getting a bit older, i do hear of more people in my life who are getting married or having a baby. haha. i can espy the pressure from a distance (i really like that word: espy). but like most people, that special someone pops up when you least expect it...which leads me to another common thought.

korea. i only have one more year of college left. and i'm sure that just like the others, this year will go by hella fast. my "future plans" are approaching and mere dreams are slowly becoming exciting realities. of course, ANYTHING can happen between now and next summer, but things seem to be going along its course just as i had planned. different culture, different people, and DIFFERENT CHURCH pretty much makes it a different life. i take much comfort in this, "escape", if you will.

so these are just a few of my fa-vo-rite things...i mean thoughts. random: as much as i hate boy bands, i cannot stop loving the Backstreet Boys' "Quit Playing Games With My Heart". i hadn't heard it in a while until yesterday when it randomly popped up on my winamp playlist. it made me really happy.

i'm trying to make it a habit to not babble when i pray now. you may not know it, but i probably pray for you just about everyday. haha. i need to stop writing now.

Thought of the Day: Movies are my escape.
Song of the Day: Super Mario's Sleigh Ride OC ReMix

audrey hepburn was truly beautiful. i always thought she was overrated with her famous "Breakfast at Tiffany's" pictures. i mean, i didn't think she was ugly or anything...just not THAT great. but after watching Roman Holiday, my eyes fell in love with her small, innocent face. i don't know what it is. she just looks so unique!

after i finished watching the movie, i watched the special features and there was a short clip of her giving a speech back in 1992. obviously, she had aged over the years and lost much of her young beauty. i found out that she passed away a year after that speech. beauty is fleeting. fame is fleeting. and of course, life is fleeting.

so many of us adore the beautiful people of our society. actors and actresses become stars and role models. they are admired and idolized. when it comes down to it, beauty can be seen as a good thing. it is desirable and gives pleasure to the eye. but when we see beautiful people (such as Audrey Hepburn), we tend to praise them for looking so good as if they did something to earn that beauty. we unconsciously say to ourselves, "Good work, beautiful person! Job well done!" but when i think about all of the attractive people i've seen or known, i realize that not a single one of them deserved any of their physically postive qualities. they did not choose their genetic makeup or the environments they lived in. everything that they are is because of the one who made them beautiful.

too often, we forget that the creator is the one to be praised and not the creation. this obviously goes beyond beauty. take any piece of creation-music, art, sports, even technology. every skill, technique, and function is beautiful because its maker is beautiful. Beethoven's 9th symphony is not awesome because Beethoven was awesome. God is awesome. the Pythagorean Theorem doesn't make Pythagoras an intelligent being. God is an intelligent being! i think you get my point. so in conclusion, Audrey Hepburn was not beautiful because of anything she had done. rather, our God who MADE her beautiful is infinitely more beautiful and worthy of praise than any piece of creation our Lord has decreed. amen.

Thought of the Day: Studying on Sundays.
Song of the Day: Yann Tiersen-Comptine d'un autre ete

Pretzelboi96 (11:46:30 PM): i'm having a discussion with my friend about apologetics
Pretzelboi96 (11:46:38 PM): he doesn't think we should use it
Vantilian522 (11:46:38 PM): ahhh that's cool
Pretzelboi96 (11:46:39 PM): haha
Vantilian522 (11:46:41 PM): haha
Vantilian522 (11:46:46 PM): ask him why
Vantilian522 (11:46:53 PM): and that would just defeat his argument
Vantilian522 (11:46:57 PM): self-defeating
Pretzelboi96 (11:47:21 PM): lol

Thought of the Day: 24's awesome.
Song of the Day: Queen-Save Me

ever since i put wheel covers on my car, it's never looked the same. it actually looks like a decent automobile now. it's been three weeks and i still get surprised every time i look at it. i can't believe i was driving without covers for over two years! buying those things was the best thing that happened to my car, and they only cost me $15. it kind of reminds me of "ugly" girls who blossom after losing weight or changing their hairstyle. you simply cannot believe how something so unpleasant can become so attractive after just a few changes.

remember that one Family Matters episode when Steve Urkel goes through that transformation machine and becomes Stefan? well, some of the pictures on my computer can testify to some major transformations that have occurred within CPC:






















































good times.

Thought of the Day: Scandal.
Song of the Day: Starfield-Filled With Your Glory