apologies to all of my faithful readers. everytime i want to blog, some random people just pop into my room and start using my microwave. in fact, half of my blogs are never quite complete. i just kinda have to get to the point, write my Song and Thought of the Day and publish. anyhoo, today is halloween and most of my friends are out so i actually have some time to do some blogging...

yesterday, i found out that my grandmother on my mom's side passed away. simon told me my mom looked really sad so i didn't give her a call. it was really weird when i heard the news. my reaction was very "unreactional." not to sound like a bastard or anything but it was like as if someone told me that tonight's dorm food was horrible. it's very unfortunate but i just swallow it and go on with my life. i wasn't too close with my grandmother...mainly b/c she lived in Korea and i'm over here. another unfortunate fact is that she wasn't christian. well, the way things were looking, i didn't see too much hope for her anyways. it was almost like i already knew she was going to die unsaved. i don't know. i guess i'm really jacked up. i admit, i'm really apathetic about the event. but i'm just being totally honest. i'm very curious about what kind of thoughts are going on in my mom's head cause i know she didn't have good history with her either. but gosh, i'm so grateful for the mom that God gave me. i'm so happy that i have a good relationship with her. i don't care what you guys say about your moms. my mom's super duper better!

man, more and more, i see the depravity of mankind. i meet more and more superficial people. i meet more and more "christians." i meet more and more and more and more! man, it's so hard living as a servant of God in college. it's really difficult evangelizing. it's like i lost my "cajones." but of course i always forget to pray about these things. i rant and rant, but the real solution is in prayer! funny how i know these things yet i don't apply til the last minute.
note to self: DON'T FORGET TO PRAY ABOUT THIS YOU IDIOT!

but i'm surprised to see myself being so consistent in my quiet times. i've been doing them almost EVERY single morning since i came to irvine. remember how i was always talking about how i was reading Kings and Chronicles? well, now i'm on Proverbs! i finished reading Job and Psalms. i'll be done with Proverbs in a few days. man, i really wish i had finished reading the Bible a long long time ago. but anyways, i really enjoyed reading Job cause it was the first time i read it. man, that book is just so profound! it's like you see man's perspective and then BAM! God speaks! its like so dope man. it kinda reminds me of Bahnsen's Debates on tape. like some hardcore athiest would give some funky argument and you're thinking, "oh boy! it's over for the Christian guy. it's gonna take a miracle to win this one." but of course, we all know that truth is always on our side. so the Christian refutes the argument and humbles the crap outta the athiest. it's so cool! you feel like making the biggest "DDEUH!" sound with your finite voice. but back to my point. you feel that Job is totally justified b/c he's like practially living this awesome holy life that you'll never live. but God appears and speaks to Job. man, talk about humility. God is just so AWESOME! it's funny cause he sounds so arrogant but it's like he has every right you know? man Job, IN YOUR FACE BUDDY!!! haha. but you know what i'm talking about. the book of Job is a profound book. it does a great job of showing you just a glimpse of God's character. you should read it if you haven't already.

so i visit jomo's blog and see that he's changed his template. i think it looks nicer but i have a harder time reading his entries with the dark background and the white font. perhaps my eyes just suck. BUT, i also noticed that my blog was under the "Hot Blogs" section. man, what a nudge at my self-esteem! *giggle* i know i know. i really gotta stop that giggling thing. it's really gay. anyways, the template looks nice dude. i'm still a consistent reader. thanks for always updating unlike the rest of this sinful nation.

Thought of the Day: Sarcasm has its limits. Even I can be humiliated.
Song of the Day: DJ Encore-I See Right Through You Vocal Mix