i am absolutely dreading school these days. i have 2 1/2 weeks of class left, and i will be officially done with my undergraduate career. these last few weeks have been going by like months. i find myself fidgeting a lot in class and looking at my watch every ten minutes. it is truly a wonder that i am not behind with my reading and assignments. but make no mistake that these papers and homework assignments are poorly prepared. having my last final on a friday doesn't help either. are there any other UC students feeling me?

burned out. are there any better words to describe me? i see it in other areas of my life as well. for example, my cluster boys are absolutely dead. i can feel their reluctance and apathy with a passion. don't even trip about it though-we're all on the same boat, right? another example is my student, Sean. homeboy cannot stand reading for the last 10 minutes of tutoring. this guy is like absolutely dying of sleepiness when reading but AS SOON AS we are done tutoring, he is back to his vigorous self. Sean is a testimony to me that it is all in the mind. you cannot always blame your shortcomings on the externals around you. most of the time, it is your perspective and attitude towards things. as the sagacious Sean Lee loved to say: "you just have to change your perspective" or something like that.

(switching gears).

today, this Korean girl from KCCC approached me to share the Gospel using the Four Spiritual Laws. instead of waving her away or telling her i was already a christian, i decided to be a little devil and play advocate. so we sat down, she literally read the entire booklet to me, and asked me if i wanted to accept Jesus. i asked her how she knew this was all true. she told me Bible. i asked how she knew the Bible was true. she didn't know. i asked her according to Law 1, if God loves me, why does He still send me to Hell? would He still love me while I was in hell? she didn't know and apologized, informing me that she just come from Korea 3 months ago to do mission training. i revealed i was a christian. she flipped.

there are too many unprepared christians out there. it is not enough to be passionate and courageous. where is your defense? it's kind of like seeing a quarterback run onto the field without the defense line. he can have the most passion and best offensive plays in the world, but if he has no defense, homeboy's gonna get hurt out there. if we're going to be witnesses of Christ, let us learn to be EFFECTIVE witnesses whom God has called us to be.

2 Corinthians 10:5-We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

i encouraged the girl to continue being bold but also to practice and always be prepared to answer questions that non-christians can ask at any moment. i hope that God uses this "traumatic" experience to give her a desire to study apologetics. afterall, that is essentially how i got started (9th grade trauma from a machine-gun interrogation by a non-christian friend in front of many other unbelievers). i am still grateful to this day for my all-star mentor, Chang, who introduced me to apologetics, reformed theology, and more specifically, Richard Pratt's "Every Thought Captive." this is the book that i am going over with Joecal for accountability. we only have two more chapters left. i'd encourage every believer to read this book soon. God made it a life-changing experience for me.

i have stupid jury duty on thursday. any suggestions?

Thought of the Day: Grade change.
Song of the Day: Dead Prez-Hip Hop