Pensive, Doubting, Fearful Heart

I recently applied for a job on a whim and went into the whole process very open and at ease. But after going through the interview and not having any updates for over a week, my heart and mind have been in a torturous state. I have lost count the number of times I have replayed the interview in my head and how I could have improved my responses. The only certainty I do have from the past week is how stupid and impatient my heart is. I have all of the reassurances and reminders that my real Boss has made His perfect decision and that I should not worry; and yet...

the title of this post speaks for itself. If you are unfamiliar with the title, it's actually a hymn from a John Newton poem. Here is the last verse that brought me to tears the first time I sang the words:

Though afflicted, tempest-tossed,

Comfortless awhile thou art,

Do not think thou canst be lost,

Thou art graven on my heart.

All thy walls I will repair,

Thou shalt be rebuilt anew,

And in thee it shall appear,

What a God of love can do.

Thought of the Day: HR

Song of the Day; Indelible Grace Music feat. Emily Deloach-Pensive, Doubting, Fearful Heart

Summer Solstice

Yesterday was the Summer Solstice and my first real free day of summer break. My tradition for every break has been to make a list of goals I would like to accomplish before the start of the next school year. One thing different about this year's list is that I have very few goals. Another thing that is different is that I included clearing out my fridge. 

I took care of tossing things that have occupied the freezer for more than a year, but the real challenge is figuring out how and when I am supposed to eat things before they expire. A pet peeve I have learned about myself is buying things that do not get used. I would say that food gone bad takes priority in that category because it is clearly something that could have met other people's immediate needs. Plus, who likes the duty of disposing the rot and gag? I can tell you now that my wife does not.

I think sharing our living space with a baby has taught me to appreciate and pursue minimalism. I have always enjoyed living with the essentials and spending the rest of my energy on God's greatest creation: food. But now that I am outnumbered by females in my life, I have been forced to reconsider my definition of essentials. My continual rationale has been to invest in good quality for the sake of greater quantity...in terms of lifespan and use. If the lifespan is shorter than expected, all I gotta say is OfferUp is a godsend.

So in conclusion, I don't have any interesting summer goals unless you consider fridge liberation a thing. I did buy Where the Crawdads Sing this morning, so maybe I'll also read in between chewing. Have a cool summer!

Thought of the Day: The Wiltern

Song of the Day: Weezer-Records