Thanksgiving Eve

Whether I succeed or fail,
Nought matters but thee alone.

Thought of the Day: Four Months
Song of the Day: Bill Withers-Lovely Day

Thy Will vs. My Will

Let me know that the work of prayer is to bring
    my will to thine,
  and that without this it is folly to pray

Tim Keller once said that we don't get to 'Give us this day our daily bread' before 'Thy will be done'. I have to stop reversing that order.


Thought of the Day: Joshua Tree
Song of the Day: America-A Horse With No Name

A Forgotten Quote

Our past sins do not paralyze God.
-Sinclair Ferguson

Thought of the Day: Stuffed Animal
Song of the Day: Mariah Carey-Fantasy

In Love

Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called ‘being in love’ usually does not last. If the old fairy-tale ending ‘They lived happily ever after’ is taken to mean ‘They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married,’ then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be ‘in love’ need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense — love as distinct from ‘being in love’ — is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be ‘in love’ with someone else. ‘Being in love’ first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. it is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.

-C.S. Lewis

Thought of the Day: Earl Grey

Song of the Day: Striking Matches-When The Right One Comes Along

Phyko.

Missions has been very good to you.
-Dinko

Thought of the Day: Esther
Song of the Day: Sade-By Your Side

People Make Mistakes

It's why they put rubbers on the ends of pencils.

-Fleabag

Thought of the Day: Spotify

Song of the Day: CityAlight-There Is Mercy

The 'Nevers' of the Gospel

O LORD,

May I never fail to come to the knowledge
        of the truth,
  never rest in a system of doctrine, however
    scriptural, that does not bring or further
      salvation,
  or teach me to deny ungodliness and
    worldly lusts,
  or help me to live soberly, righteously, godly;
  never rely on my own convictions and resolutions,
    but be strong in thee and in thy might;
  never cease to find thy grace sufficient
    in all my duties, trials, and conflicts;
  never forget to repair to thee
    in all my spiritual distresses and outward
      troubles,
  in all the dissatisfactions experienced in
    creature comforts;
  never fail to retreat to him who is full of grace
    and truth, the friend that loveth at all times,
    who is touched with feelings of my infirmities,
    and can do exceeding abundantly for me;
  never confine my religion to extraordinary
    occasions, but acknowledge thee in all my ways;
  never limit my devotions to particular seasons
    but be in thy fear all the day long;
  never be godly only on the sabbath
    or in thy house, but on every day abroad
      and at home;
  never make piety a dress but a habit,
    not only a habit but a nature,
    not only a nature but a life.
Do good to me by all thy dispensations,
  by all means of grace,
  by worship, prayers, praises,
And at last let me enter that world where is
  no temple, but only thy glory
  and the Lamb’s.

Thought of the Day: Seating Charts
Song of the Day: Mazzy Star-In The Kingdom

Teaching Hope

One of my students told me she would be missing class tomorrow to attend the court trial for the man who recently murdered her father. It saddens me to think how much trauma many of my students carry with them every day, trauma that has probably not been addressed or processed in a healthy way. She is in my largest class of 47 enrolled students and I often wonder what I can do to best support them when there's only one of me and...so many of them.

I just finished reading Teaching Hope, a book that I had borrowed from a good teacher friend of mine. Years ago, I had read the Freedom Writers, stories written by high school students who were taught by Erin Gruwell in Long Beach. This book is a collection of stories written by teachers who show the perspective of working in many challenging situations and environments; hence, its title. My biggest takeaway is that teaching will always be hard, but students need good teachers in their lives.

How do I become the good teacher that my students need?

Thought of the Day: Instant Pot
Song of the Day: Vince Guaraldi-A Taste of Honey

Seasons Finale

I think for the first time in my adult life, I do not have a show I am excited to watch. I tried to start one new show and four different seasons of different shows in the past month. Everything feels repetitive. Nothing original is engaging. With the hundreds of shows available at the click of a button, I have finally run out of things I want to watch.

And it feels liberating!


Thought of the Day: Day 1
Song of the Day: Green Day feat. Miranda Lambert-Ordinary World

Serenity Prayer

O God, 
give us the serenity to accept what cannot be changed, 
the courage to change what can be changed, 
and the wisdom to know the one from the other.
-Reinhold Niebuhr, 1932

Thought of the Day: Testimony
Song of the Day: Vince Guaraldi - Star Song

Upgrades and Downgrades

The past couple of weeks have been filled with consecutive life improvements.

New Phone
I probably could have used the S7 for a bit longer, but it's kinda hard to say no to a brand new phone for $500. I even got Verizon to waive the $40 upgrade fee! Glad I waited till post-Cambodia.


New TV
My brother and I were watching Gran Torino and thought it was strange how they had filmed the movie with these weird horizontal lines. Turns out Clint did not film the movie with those lines; they are signs of failing graphics or damage. It is not easy watching a TV that resembles binder paper. Also kinda hard to say no to a 4K TV for $380!

New Rice Cooker
We knew Simon's rice cooker from college was on the older side, but it still got the job done...until yesterday. The rice smelled something evil even though I had just made it a couple of days ago and it left a permanent stain on the inner lid. Kinda hard to say no to a new multi-purpose pot for $50.



But school has been a different story.

The principal left our school (again).
My school buddy, the Librarian, emailed me today that he would not be returning.
The assistant principal hired someone today to replace my current co-teacher.

The upcoming school year feels like a downgrade.


Thought of the Day: Prepping
Song of the Day: Beach Boys-Good Vibrations

Cambodia

was amazing.

This is a picture of Mark and his medical team that works with many rescued victims of human trafficking. The woman in orange is one of the few second generation Khmer Christians in the country. Her parents lived through and survived the Khmer Rouge out of 210 Christians. Incredible.

There are too many crazy stories that were told, but there is one about a former prostitute that cleaned up her life and married a Christian guy. When Mark asked the guy if he knew everything about her past, he said that he did. But Mark asked him if he knew EVERYTHING everything. The guy said he cried for so many days that his stomach hurt after hearing everything about the girl's past. In the end, he had to ask himself, "Why shouldn't I accept her if Jesus has accepted us?"

God is doing some amazing things in that country.


Thought of the Day: Morning Hike
Song of the Day: CityAlight-Ancient of Days

Phases?

I got into this strange phase of listening to Khalid. He's pretty popular with my students, which is why I thought the generational gap would keep me from appreciating this Mumble R&B. I can't believe he's only 21, and I'm embarrassed to admit that I like his Free Spirit album. I hope this is just a phase.

In the past month, I met various people who genuinely enjoy hiking. I've always thought of it as something nice to do but never thought of turning it into a hobby. But I happened to be nearby an outlet mall over the weekend and decided to finally invest in a pair of hiking shoes. And I actually went for a hike today. By myself. And I loved it! I hope this is NOT just a phase.

Thought of the Day: Cambodia
Song of the Day: Khalid-Better

Golden Buzzer

I got really into America's Got Talent last summer when I would take YouTube breaks in between my online courses. Like any reality talent show, I think the appeal of this show comes from seeing the reaction of the judges and subsequently the reaction of the performer. We usually see the best reactions from the Golden Buzzer moments because they represent total acceptance and acknowledgement from a judge. Isn't that what we are all constantly striving for in life? Acceptance.


We sang this song at church recently and it reminded me once again that I've already been fully accepted by the ultimate judge. Even if I experience painful fleeting moments of rejection in life, I should remember that I've already gotten my Golden Buzzer.

On that note, the Golden State Warriors were rejected another championship last night and my dad texted me ㅜㅜㅜ, but I like how Steph ended his post-game interview: "It's kind of hard to talk about it cause it's a tough way to go out. It's tough to lose in the finals, but story's not over yet."

I should get back to my online course.


Thought of the Day: Scenarios
Song of the Day: Sam Cooke-Nobody Knows

GoFundMe

If you haven't received my support letter but would like to support our summer mission support team to Cambodia this summer, click here!

Thought of the Day: Clarity
Song of the Day: Cory Asbury-Reckless Love

I think I'm in love

with Red Hot Chili Peppers.

I remember when a former student of mine argued that Red Hot Chili Peppers' Stadium Arcadium album was clearly better than Foo Fighters' One by One album. I thought he was absurd even though I had never even heard the Chili Peppers' album all the way through. It's incredible just how many good songs are on this 2-CD album!

I'm still buying CDs and have absolutely no regrets! I also highly recommend De La Soul's 3 Feet High and Rising. An absolute hip hop masterpiece.


Thought of the Day: Matcha Scone
Song of the Day: Red Hot Chili Peppers-Stadium Arcadium Album

I Love Dating Apps!

said no one ever.

It's like browsing through Slickdeals and trying to find the best deal(s).

It's like sending out your resume to several job offers that never get back to you.

It's like a kick in the nuts but to your heart, self-esteem, and personal time.

It's like an emphatic YES to Tony Soprano's "Am I such a toxic person?"

It's like...


not working.

Thought of the Day: Bowling
Song of the Day: Oasis-Wonderwall

And Bye Bye

Barry, you inspire me!


Thought of the Day: Half-Day
Song of the Day: Best Of DJ Premier Vol 1

Happy Fools Day

Wise men say only fools rush in.


Thought of the Day: HBO Go Chrome
Song of the Day: Elvis-Can't Help Falling In Love

Support the Cause!

Thought of the Day: Sorry To Bother You
Song of the Day: The Hubbards-Just Touch