"the Son knows personally and experientially what is it like to endure temptation. Jesus was and is without sin. Tempation did not arise from within him, as it does with us. Yet, as true man, Jesus was indeed tempted. Only one who resists temptation feels its full force."
-commentary from Spirit of the Reformation Bible

i like that last statement. it's kind of like not fully knowing how high a mountain is until you've reached the top. when Christ resisted the temptation to turn the stones into loaves of bread, he was resisting an appeal to a biological drive. i never knew that. Christ really experienced every temptation we could face. no, he actually faced greater temptation b/c his authority was being challenged as well. the Lord sympathizes with us. His power really is made perfect in our weakness. awesome.

Thought of the Day: Stupid Biola.
Song of the Day: Temptations-Ain't No Mountain High Enough

i don't know how but the debate of whether a tomato was a fruit or vegetable came up at the dinner table. my mom was SO certain that it was a vegetable...

(in korean).
me: but tomatoes have seeds. if it has seeds, then it's a fruit.
mom: it's not! i can't believe he's challenging his own mother.
me: ok, then how do you know it's a vegetable?
mom: ...
me: ...
simon: ...
mom: just know that it is!

i've never seen my mom so happily stubborn in my life. i just had to disprove her...

(in korean).
me: mom, it's a fruit! it says on askoxford.com that "a tomato is definitely a fruit."
mom: (looks at website). "a tomato is definitely a fruit." umohmohmoh! eehsanghaneh!
me: ahahhahahahhah.
mom: no, i read in a magazine that everyone believes it's a fruit but it's really a vegetable. i'm going to look for that magazine.

looks like mama doesn't always know best. =D

i had my first real day of relaxation this summer. no plans, obligations, duties, appointments, tutoring, or time to wake up.

1. 10 hours of sleep
2. ate brunch
3. started reading Pilgrim's Progress
4. ate lunch.
5. read again.
6. fell asleep in my chair.
7. balled with simon.
8. showered.
9. ate dinner.

chillax on a really hot day.

yg retreat was really good. very gospel-centered sermon/bible studies. very hot. very red.

one really important thing i learned from yg retreat was that there shouldn't be a single habitual sin that we cannot overcome. to say that we cannot overcome particular sins in our lives is to spit at the Gospel and say that Christ's work was not good enough for us. for sure, pastor ben was the best retreat speaker i have ever had in my life. so convicting. so passionate. so scary. so gospel.
cg retreat was really good too. i almost feel like it was good in the ways yg was not: more interactive and laidback speaker, smaller and more mature group, lighter schedule, food 10x better, nicer cabins and better bathroom system, and of course, better pictures for better memories.

i was so encouraged by pastor john's sermon on loving God with our minds and thoughts. i've never heard someone speak so passionately on studying for God's glory and seeing how all of our studies should point to Christ (i can't believe zen missed that sermon!). i'm really glad that dykas (especially) heard it. haha. pastor john kept telling me to considering learn Greek even after the retreat. what a passionate and geeky pastor. LEGOS!

i have lots of time on my hand for the next 3 weeks or so. my goals are to finish reading Pilgrim's Progress, The Holiness of God, and Every Young Man's Battle (this year's cluster book). it's like finishing one book every week. summer is the only time i make time to catch up on my reading. try to keep me accountable by asking me what i've been reading about.

upcoming events: 9th grade sleepover, senior class sleepover, and outreach!

the fun never stops.

Thought of the Day: Soonjung = Pure Heart.
Song of the Day: Ivy-Midnight.

christian academy worst memory...

student: you don't know how to teach.

it's finally over...

and so the retreats begin.

Thought of the Day: Senoritas Bonitas.
Song of the Day: Black Eyed Peas-My Hump

i got home at 9:30 and just got out of the shower. it is 10:05pm and i can finally relax for at least 30 min. until i go to bed. man, i have been realy really stressed the whole day today. i can't stop thinking about christian academy stuff and car trouble. no matter how hard i try, it won't escape my mind. i am truly heavy with burden.

i was reading through xangas and i came upon some really encouraging entries. i have friends who are truly happy just about every day of their lives. even in their hardships, they are rejoicing in the Lord and reminding themselves of God's faithfulness. i think i can best sum up their lives (based on their entries) with one word: passion. man, when was the last time i lived a life of passion? when did i last encourage someone because i was living my life so passionately for the Lord? i honestly feel like it's been years. it's funny cause as i was reading those xangas, i was listening to the Righteous Brothers' "She's Lost That Loving Feeling."-You've lost that lovin' feeling. Now it's gone, gone, gone, woah-u-woah-u-woooah.

passion should never be a phase. it should be a lifestyle. we have every reason to live very rich and full lives that reflect God's glory. every moment of our lives should be beating with joy because of the Gospel salvation we have received. people should be wondering why we live the way we do. people should stare at us in amazement and curiosity. why does my life lack this kind of passion?

these days, i feel so weak and inadequate. i am ashamed and disappointed in myself. i feel like Job after he lost everything: humbled. but even in his suffering, he did not fail to praise God.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

this is my prayer, oh God. when i am weak you are strong. Hallelujah.

Thought of the Day: Basic geometry.
Song of the Day: Righteous Brothers-She's Lost That Loving Feeling

notice how there's not a single scratch on the paint. no cracked headlights and sideview mirrors all in one piece. even all of the tires have those tire cap things. i wish my car looked like that...even if beauty is fleeting.

since i've been making quite some money this summer, i had officially decided to "fix up" my car so that it wouldn't look like a total piece of junk. with an estimated cost of $200-$300, i think it'd be a good investment. unfortunately, i found a crack on my windshield on sunday which has grown to a good 8 inches now. that'll probably cost me another good $200.
cracked signal light = $70
cracked sideview mirror = $150
cracked windshield = $200
tire cap thingys = ?
labor costs = ?
decent looking car = priceless? I WISH!
man, my car has gone through so many repairs within the past 2 years. i must have spent a decent $2000 just fixing auto damages (and the fun don't stop). i am experiencing a third coolant leak somewhere in my car, but i'm not going to bother to fix it just yet. i never would've thought that a car could give you stress...but i also never would've thought that MY car could give me pride:

(kenny opens door and automatic seatbelt moves down).
ted: WOAH!
kenny: after i close the door, it goes back up and i put on the second seatbelt.
*closes door and automatic seatbelt moves up*
ted: WOW! the outside doesn't look good but the inside is so nice!

jordan and dillon had a similar reaction the first time they came into my car too.

my car may have internal/external problems but she gets the job done...by God's grace.


Chrisitan Academy has been (and still is) a very humbling experience. junior high students can be so immature, inconsiderate, and indolent. it's crazy to think that i was once a burden just like them. it's even crazier to think that i once had teachers who knew how to deal with students like them (and probably ones who were even worse). i have been so discouraged that i even questioned if teaching was the right profession for me to go into. Christian Academy is only a glimpse of the real deal. haha. priscilla has caught me a number of times looking so discouraged and drained from teaching those 7th grade sinners. i remember telling sun how much i enjoyed teaching those kids after the first week of academy. "it's only been the first week," he said. *hysterical laughter* he was right. but with every sorrow there is always room for joy. i love it when my 8th graders actually understand when i'm explaining a problem. i love it when my most disobedient students even bother to greet me in the morning. i love it when my 7th graders are diligently working on the assignment in silence (this is a rarity). i love it when i can eat lunch with my students and just be one of them. i love it when the young ones wave goodbye to me. john ro was right. if you do Christian Academy just for the money, you're going to be miserable. i think that goes for any job.

Thought of the Day: Sweaty.
Song of the Day: Starfield-Filled With Your Glory